Once we are traumatized, we carry the unresolved trauma with us forever, unless we can somehow get the trauma knot untied by therapy or another personal growth method. (Also, life experience will often untie many knots without significant effort on our parts.) If unresolved, the trauma typically shows up later in life as stress.
Example of Later Sexual Stress. For those sexually molested as children, sexuality carries with it an amount of unhealthy stress as a child that typically carries over to adulthood. If sexual situations come into their lives, the unresolved sexual traumas are also immediately there in their unconscious minds, waiting in the wings trying to get resolved. This is felt as tension and stress. To relieve this tension, sex frequently becomes an arena for acting out, either by circumscribing sexual behavior or by being promiscuous. Both these sexual strategies temporarily lower stress levels without helping to resolve the trauma. Other addictive behavior (such as drinking, smoking and overeating) may be used instead to reduce the stress levels caused by sexual situations, similarly without lasting benefit in terms of resolving the trauma.
Stress may appear later as fear, anxiety, jumpiness, insomnia, panic, or pain in the body such as a headache or backache. (These are psychosomatic aches if caused by stress.) Stress is a major factor in most such psychosomatic complaints.
© 2008 by Thayer White
Finding Your Soul in the Spirituality Maze
|Excerpt from Be Your Own Therapist: "This seems impossible to achieve, to be happy when we get things we don't want. The reason it seems impossible is that we believe we should be unhappy when we don't get what we want. (In all of this, there is the following truth: if we believe such a situation calls for unhappiness, we will be unhappy.)"|