Several so-called emotions are inherently stuck. Feel them and you stay in them. They remain around forever, unless the truths beneath them are felt. Some inherently stuck feelings are: guilt, jealousy, depression, humiliation, shame and degradation. Feeling them for any longer than necessary to recognize them is not productive. Be on the lookout behind them for unwanted feelings (such as love, fear, rage or grief) which, if felt, could help change the immobility. It is often but not always true that -
Guilt indicates repressed anger at early parenting figures,
Jealousy indicates a fear of loss of early parenting figures,
Depression indicates repression of difficult feelings, and
Humiliation, shame and degradation indicate difficulties with self-esteem (or with judging others if others are judged as humiliated, shamed or degraded).
I suggest that you use the above list as a likely starting point for exploration of your own stuck emotions.
Feeling bad? Make a new choice! The prescription is very simple and valid, too. But, finding the right choice or a happy choice may be difficult. We may have to choose and experience several unhappy alternatives (which might make us feel worse) before we find one that will be right for us. However, if we persevere with our old unhappy ways, we are almost guaranteed continued unhappiness, clear evidence that we are e-moting in a skewed manner.
Reminder: For maximum happiness, content-ment and inner peace, we need all our emotions, not just the pleasant ones.
© 2008 by Thayer White
Finding Your Soul in the Spirituality Maze
|Excerpt from Be Your Own Therapist: "Please note how one simple-to-describe problem, denied anger at a parent, may result in a multiplicity of possible symptoms."|